Ask the coach

Q: Last year at a business event I ran into a good friend of many years with whom I had lost touch, but who is now general counsel of a Fortune 500 company. He congratulated me on my recent partnership and, not too long afterward, accepted my invitation to have lunch and catch up on the intervening years. However, he has not been available for subsequent lunch invitations, or, if he accepts, cancels at the last minute. What can I do to stay on his calendar so I can develop him as a client?
A: First, don't take it personally. He's likely not rejecting you or expressing unwillingness to see you. More likely, he sees your invitations as primarily social, since that's the historical basis for your relationship. In terms of the business day, that's not much of a priority. Too often, busy executives simply don't have time for social lunches despite their personal desire to indulge them. That's why the call it the workday. To shift your encounters with him from the 'socially indulgent' category to the 'important to my job' category you need a legitimate business reason to get together.
Invest some time understanding your friend's industry, and the issues that determine and shape the decisions he (and his direct reports) must make or implement effectively. Begin associating yourself with such issues by forwarding news items and other information of potential use or interest to your friend in his role as GC. When you do speak or meet, shift your emphasis by asking questions about those issues to understand their impact on his company and career. Your new role as advisor will not only help your appointments compete for scarce time in his day, but will create a discussion continuity that will lead to him seeing value in introducing you to his direct reports, too. As we all know, that's usually where the tactical legal assignments get dispensed.